Celebrity Superbowl

Let me start by saying I am not a football fan. I somehow knew that Seattle was competing in the Superbowl, I guess advertising works, but arriving at Central City Brewing on Sunday for the Superbowl party I couldn't tell what other pack of oversized men would be tackling them for the trophy. And despite all the football jerseys being sported with various names and numbers I was still at a loss as to which team was which on the big screen. So, as you are probably becoming increasingly aware, I am not writing to give you my blow by blow of the tackles and touchdowns. In fact if you have read this far you are probably wondering why I was at Superbowl party at all. Well, wonder no longer.

I was asked by a friend to help record the Superbowl half-time event that Central City Brewing was offering. They had lingerie models for the event, as well as Ricky, Julien and Bubbles from the Trailer Park Boys to keep customers from getting antsy during the game downtime. When I got the offer I immediately agreed. I am one of the hordes of Canadians that enjoys the TPB, although not as avid a fan as some of the people I encountered.

So, yes, you got it, I am writing to tell you about my celebrity sighting. First of all, not one of them is smaller or, for that matter, larger than I had imagined, as is so often the case when seeing celebrities under mother nature's merciless lighting effects. Then when they emerged on stage in their trailer park garb, it was difficult to imagine that these three were forcing an act, they embodied the characters to a suspicious degree (Is this who they genuinely were?).

Bubbles grabbed a guitar and played for the screaming and increasingly inebriated crowd. His song was called "Liquor and Whores". Well, after the awkward event of watching near teenagers wearing teensy underwear and uncomfortable looking ant-gravity breast contraptions, I think people were ready to let loose. A lot of tension was built up. During the underwear event there was a kind of hush to the crowd as the girls tried to sashay in tall, skinny heels that looked as frail as their own limbs. They were directed to walk around a circuit which lead them directly into a crowd of stunned and suddenly uncomfortable portly and moustached men. I wasn't sure whether the men were worried that their wives or girlfriends were watching them through waterfall bangs and caked on makeup, or whether they were suddenly aware that these girls were the ages of their daughters and were repeating psalms under their breaths in order to exorcise the evil thoughts. Either way the response to these women was strained. Not even the knowledge that Cindy was a Virgo, and that Sarah liked to do yoga in her spare time, as was announced by the MC, who was clearly familiar with the Maxim magazine format of trying to make utterly unattainable girls a teensy bit more human, seemed to be getting the audience to cheer more loudly. It is possible that maybe, like me, everyone was just waiting for the TPB's.

The crowd yelled and cheered as Julien sipped on his signature rum and Coke, and then got even more vocal when Ricky enquired about getting some weed sent back to Halifax. But it was really Bubbles who stole the show with his crass humor and impish behavior.

Later on that evening I had the opportunity to speak to the Julien character, whose real name is John. He informed me that the three of them write the scripts, which made it even clearer why the line between the characters and real life persona of these actors felt so blurry. They definitely swore just as much in real life. Although I must confess Bubbles looked a little funny without his coke bottle glasses.

Well there you have it. That's it. That's all I've got.