The Little Green Sprouts Wave Goodbye (RIP Rheostatics)

Although it is the time of spring and blossoms, little green sprouts everywhere are weeping. After well over two decades, the Rheostatics are calling it quits tonight with a final show at Massey Hall in Toronto.

I have lots of happy memories of the Rheos.

My life as a green sprout began after being pelted with hot potatoes.

Rather late and somewhat disorganized, I had dashed through the door o' my friends' house en route to my first Rheostatics show only to be thrown my dinner--two steaming potatoes still in their foil jackets. Upon my arrival everyone clamoured out the door and sprinted down the street to catch the bus. It was a breathless and crazy run, made more challenging by the catch-and-release of potatoes tossed among us: the spuds were too hot to hold.

Claire, the Rheostatics' only top 40 hit, was the themesong for the radio show I did on Citr. I don't know why -- it had nothing whatsoever to do with the theme (environment). But it was just so cheery, so boppy. The song made us instantly blissful at the top of the show. Besides, I was a student and what zoned-out student can't identify with that cry for help: "Clarify me Claire. Let me see you save a mind that isn't there. Purify me. Clarify me. Claire!!!"

A Northern Wish was also the themesong and namesake for my favorite Citr show, which for years and years played all-Canadian indie pop, long before its present vogue.

The last time I saw the Rheos was at the now defunct Sugar Refinery -- a tiny venue. I had helped stake out a table at 4 pm. By eight it was packed and sauna-like, all the windows sealed tight to avoid noise complaints. By midnight, blocked into my seat, I hadn't had a drink of anything in about five hours. It was sweltering. I suddenly realized I was really woozy.

I stood up. And blacked out. Just as I was about to hit the deck a hefty stranger muscled through the hoards, swooped in, caught me and carried me outside. "You crumpled and he picked you up in his arms just like a little cat," a friend told me later. All I remember is coming to on the back stoop, next to a big, tough, grey-bearded guy who was gruff but so sweet. He didn't want me to feel embarrassed about fainting. A kind server gave me a glass of orange juice.

The show went on well into the wee hours. Like the Sadies, the Rheostatics can play all night. They never run out of songs -- or energy. It's hard to believe a show will ever end.

And now the show is ending for good.

But new green sprouts will grow. Thirteen Canadian bands, from Cuff the Duke to the Local Rabbits, have secretly recorded covers for a Rheostatics tribute CD, with all proceeds from digital sales going to charity.

So as Martin Tielli's voice warbles into the distance one last time, "Did you get my message on the People's Radio? I wrote it in Alberta, across the prairie spine." --well, all is not lost. The Rheostatics may rocket away into memory, but their shadow will stretch, stratospheric, from shore to rocky shore.

At least that's my Northern Wish.