2010 bid book an Etch-A-Sketch. Turns out there was supposed to be an air-conditioned, 8 lane tunnel all the way to Whistler; a kevlar security dome encasing all of the Lower Mainland; social housing in the sky made out of rainbows; and a giant innukshuk carved out of Burnaby Mountain. Oh and it was supposed to be environmentally friendly.

Now, it's almost like we don't even want people to come. Especially Americans, which I'm all for, its just, you know, we should probably have this thing paid off before the next recession hits.

Is budget deficit much greater than predicted? "Hansen told a Kamloops radio station yesterday that he 'wouldn't bet the mortgage' on hitting his pre-election targets". Yeah don't bet the mortgage, because that's what got us into this whole mess in the first place. Great choice of words there bud.

Heroic man gives life to save his car. A truly remarkable story of courage and sacrifice.

Council considering a bike bridge over False Creek. Probably a good idea (see above).

Meanwhile the Vancouver Sun is doing its part to encourage people to stay in their cars: The cheapest places to park your car

Was it just me or was that the most patriotic Canada Day ever? Is it the recession or something?The war? Tone it down a little guys.

Shelter fuss exposes amateurs. Would that be the people living next to those shelters? Those people suck at living in a city.

Hunt is on for heiress who's gone missing from Vancouver's streets. But whom we only realised was missing when there was a large sum of money involved.

Go east young man: Assaults skyrocket in frustrated neighbourhood. Hmmm, weird, assaults have actually decreased downtown. Why would that be?

Will security cameras become an Olympic legacy? Are you asking me? Oh, um, yes. Yes they will. Did I get the answer right?

Mounties appealing decision on Taser inquiry. Why don't you try appealing to the public whose trust you've destroyed instead? Just an idea.

Who'll trust mayor after shelter freak show? "I'm sure there are some Vision Vancouver types who thought it was deliciously subversive to stick a bunch of junkies and crackheads into a smug cocoon of latte-sipping condo-dwellers and watch the ensuing mayhem". So you admit there is a "smug cocoon of latte-sipping condo-dwellers" yet fail to see how the two are inseparable? That they share a place on the same socio-economic axis? Maybe the fact that there exists such a sharp divide in this city, this once proud working class logging camp, is the real freak show. "I spoke to a guy on CKNW radio last week who said he doesn't let his wife walk in the neighbourhood any more unless he accompanies her -- carrying a baseball bat". Talk about sheltered. You people disgust me. Now let's all go and celebrate Canada's 'diversity'. Fucking Hypocrites.

These are the same people that think Insite encourages drug use, despite yet another report to the contrary.

Are you middle class? Are you serious?

Province doesn't have promised cash for leaky condos. Something poetic about taking money from new construction projects to pay for old ones done wrong.

Heil Harper

It just gets better, and better, and better.

B.C. housing minister apologizes to Vancouver mayor for calling city's tactics on homeless 'amateurish'. What you're supposed to do apparently is buy a bunch of hotels, say that you've solved the housing crisis, win an election, then cite the economic woes as the reason they're not getting built. Duh.

I just don't get it. These two articles in the Courier illustrate such a bizarre contrast in my mind: Police rate high in public opinion poll + Temporary shelters' future in doubt. Shelter attracts crime> citizens complain> shelter shut-down. Gangs run wild> citizens complain> more cops needed. Drugs everywhere> blame drug addicts> praise cops.

Whistler Olympic party zone producer wanted. "A river of 20,000 people will flow through Whistler village as part of a $17.8-million party of Olympic proportions, which will run 16 hours a day for 17 days during the 2010 Winter Games". Doesn't that just sound enticing? A river of fanny-packs and matching North Face jackets streaming past vinyl pavilions with credit card companies trying to win you a new car filling up on Monster Energy drink, looking for authentic native art and smoked salmon. Fucking kill me. PS you people need to stop using Olympic as an adjective to describe the size of things during the Olympics.

2010 Olympic posters revealed. "And in a smart marketing move the Paralympic poster, featuring the other half of the maple leaf, can be put beside it to make a complete image". Fitting since we'll probably end up paying double for the Olympics.

Supporters of Iranian protestors gather in downtown Vancouver. "They came together on a night when Michael Jackson rules headlines". Supporters of Iranian protestors vie for the attention of the media who only months ago were calling for Iran to be bombed, away from the death of a man whom only years ago they were calling a pedophile.

Meanwhile, local media turn to Twitter, further cementing the death of Pop Media (says he with a straight face while linking to a Tumblr page).

Ministry removes controversial Middle East question from B.C. history exam. "They have been fighting to regain a homeland since they were driven out in 1948. Some have lived their entire lives in refugee camps. Forty years later, Israel still refuses to recognize their right to exist as a nation." The question should have read: which group of rock-throwing terrorists hate Jews the most? Duh.

RCMP using intimidation to silence Olympic protest, group says. I do not think that this is true. That being said, I'd like to, um, voluntarily list a few items of public record:
I am a big, big, fan of the RCMP.
I hereby do not condone violence of any sort except for in hockey.
I never once said that I was going to throw human feces at the Olympic torch parade.

Don't

Scared residents still want temporary homeless shelters shut down. Aw, come on, watching the drug dealers and toy-dog walkers vie for bench space at Emery Barnes has made year two of life in Yaletown existentially bearable.

Meanwhile, Pivot has a petition going to save the shelters, which run out of funding at the end of this month.

B.C. issues first smoking-in-the-car-with-your-kid ticket. $109?? Come on, the guy was clearly under the influence of alcohol and far from framing any rational decisions. And any parent-smoker knows that a passenger side 13-year-old (not to mention drunkenness) causes cigarettes to light themselves. Have the police no mercy??

Plans for six new waste-to-energy plants around the Lower Mainland. "Instead of seeing garbage as garbage, we're seeing garbage as a resource that we can actually use." We of the Morning Brew firmly support said perspective. Only meta-Canwest-phorically, of course... burning our garbage is probably not the best idea.

Marijuana activist Tim Felger shunned by Abbotsford. I'm convinced this guy was hired to make Marc Emery seem intelligent. I mean seriously man. I still call dibs on that bike when it turns up at a police auction though.

ALERT: Two local reporters and three UBC studies confirm that Immigrants who speak English find better jobs. Meanwhile, cabbies and convenience store clerks continue to enjoy higher job security than Sun staffers, provide more for community than UBC Geographers. Literacy is so overrated...