Can't talk to Vancouverites? OK!

i've bemoaned the "on-guard" nature of people here for a while -- me included. this is a fab idea!

I think I am one of the rare people in Vancouver who will actually have a conversation with complete strangers. maybe because I grew up in a small town? In any case, I've met some very cool people as a result. Unfortunately this also means I get targeted by crazies and creepy old men who can't stop staring at my chest. Sometimes being friendly backfires. I think a lot of people here have met up with one too many crazies, and have become jaded and aloof as a result. Everyone walks around in their little bubble - and the ascent of the ipod doesn't help matters.

Yeah, I hear you. Call me old-fashioned, but a while ago I looked around my train and realized that almost everyone had either earbuds or a phone in their ears. The death of conversation with strangers?

Hear, hear! :) What a nice story!

I've moaned about this for almost a decade on my blog. Many people that talk to strangers here in Vancouver, are people I'd like to avoid -- The normal, friendly people here quickly become less talkative because of it.

It's a weird phenomenon. I think the button is a good idea ;)

I also think this is a great idea!

"There seems to be this underlying dynamic in Vancouver, that it's really inappropriate to speak to someone you don't know or don't have any reference to, "......you don't think that this type of behavior happens in other cities? I have been to other cities...Seattle/Portland/L.A./S.F./Phoenix/Las Vegas/New York/Toronto/Calgary/Montreal/Seoul/Bangkok/Singapore/Sydney!! This type of behavior happens in ALL!!!!! big cities you stupid socialist left wing up yer ass think that Vancouver has the worst of it bitch!!!!

and I am a 4th generation Vancouverite and the people who made my city that way are the fucks who moves here from the cities where this was already happening!!!! They brought it here, we used to be able to talk to each other now we just want to kill each other!!!

it will all end soon and all the marketing bastards will go back to TO LON and NY and the West Coast will be safe again for us REAL Vancouverites that actually care about our region!! PS I am not an Indian but a 4th gen Brit whose family was trying to get away from the shitty capitalist money bottom line how do I look to others way of thinking that you want to espouse here!!!!

P.S. I agree that people in Vancouver(and the rest of the world) can't talk to each other and the reason is they only express there true selves via this medium!!!! WE ARE ALL AFRAID!!!

4th gen Brit whose family was trying to get away from the "shitty capitalist bottom line"? More like they were trying to escape the excessive taxation and stifling overregulation of the UK and the continent. Why do you think the Rolling Stones became tax exiles around 1970 or so? But its true, most of Vancouver's current social woes are imported.

Whoa dude, I hope that when I wear my button proudly, Rob does not come up to talk to me!

Vancouverites are always gonna be hostile to Easterners, with or without your buttons.

Get used to it.

Plus, I would call it more like Standoffish.....not Onguard.

yeah right rob, and your ancestors are from where exactly? i absolutely hate the attitude of AMNOE (After Me No One Else) - especially egregious on the Gulf Islands...

Wow, Rob, you really exhibit the passive-aggressive behaviour that is closely related to the absolute core of the problem that this simple solution is trying to address.

Also, if the web medium is the only outlet you have to express your "true self", I have to admit that this glimpse into your unguarded personality is disturbing to say the least.

...I think the passive side has more to do with the blend of:

-environment (nice outdoors, who cares about talking to people :))

-weather (always raining, less socializing unless you're in a bar)

-diversity (language/culture barriers can make it harder, although sometimes a good icebreaker)

-big city (getting bigger and bigger)

-technology

the one thing I think "may" be different with Vancouver is that it's clique. Like why talk to more people if you have your group of solid friends... hmm... seems like everyone would like to talk to more new people, we just don't know how.

I profess myself mystified. As a thoroughly standoffish British woman, I have yet never experienced a problem talking to people in Vancouver, or having Vancouverites talk to me.

Maybe it depends where you are. If you're expecting people to come up and talk to you in bars and clubs, dream on. Almost everywhere else, I find people here friendly and open. Especially the very entertaining nutters on the buses - scary the first time they start blathering at you but you soon learn that even a certified loon often has something interesting or amusing to say.

Vancouver is no different from any fairly big city around the world and in many ways it's much friendlier. I guess buttons like this may be a fun way to improve social interaction but at the end of the day all it takes is a little effort.

i find it so interesting when no one on transit talks to each other. for four years i have seen the same people ride my same bus every morning at the same time. we all just nod at each other and pull out a book or some music, anything. for four years and still counting none of these people have actually spoken. i think it's mainly because they don't want to feel an obligation to have a conversation everytime. which, granted, i agree with. i like to have my time alone in the morning or afternoon, to work, whatever, by myself. but it is incredible how many people avoid talking all the time.

one small group of people on this bus started talking and then they all satrted taking different timed buses after a month of conversation.

i enjoy talking and meeting new people but like shallom said way up there ^^ i attract crazies like nothing else!

Dear Crazy Rob:

Thank you for posting so many comments on my article. I'll probably be earning some change because of you at the end of the fiscal month.

Can someone make some "OK! (except for Crazy Rob)" buttons?

Maybe it isn't correct to limit this mentality to Vancouver as I think it is largely due to the individual as well as social cultural dynamics. It certainly isn't a West Coast Vancouver issue.
I was born in Vancouver and it has changed, as far as I am concerned, for the worse. I hear people say how they heard it was so laid back and friendly and that when they came here they didn't find that to be true. My response is that is largely due to the number of immigrants (by immigrants I mean non Vancouver native; I don't mean it as a racial slur, per se) that have arrived with their own, largely different social attitudes.
Vancouver was primarily more of a European 'settlement', that is to say that 15+ years ago most places seemed to be owned by them, and it seemed a lot more intimate and real. The long time Vancouverites, wherever they were from, maintained this atmosphere.
After Expo 86 Vancouver gained worldwide exposure especially to an affluent audience the primary of which (based on observation) appear to be Asian. The rest of the Canadian demographic are, more often than not, not from Vancouver.
As it currently stands Vancouver appears to now be run by money and celebrity or people motivated by money and celebrity. The intimate and genuine spirit has been demolished in favour of ambition and superficiality; gentrification and the generic. Just look at the architecture and shops downtown.
It is all a reflection of the other; this appears to be the cause and effect of so-called progress and technology (those things, in particular, that keep us from individual direct contact) and, as cynical as it may be, there is no sign of it getting better (changing). That is to say, I think, that people are aware of how distressing things are and, rather than make the sacrifice and effort to alter it, accept and pursue it themselves.

Can't wait to try it out!
... Waiting for a reply to my email right now :)

Hi,

We're getting through the buttons requests as fast as we can. Sorry for the delay, people. We're printing them as quick as we can.

I agree with many of the reasons stated here for Vancouver's unsocialness. As a Vancouverite living in Toronto (apologies)Vancouverites can sometimes be so laid back they fall over and are, not to mention, rain soaked most of the time. When living in cities that are more cramped, largely populated and in general busier, it can be well, exhausting, but there is an energy abuzz all the time. Vancouver needs to generate more of this energy within the city - more interaction and interest in culture etc., and so the buttons are a great idea. Always miss the heat of these posts by a few days! I love to see that Vancouverites are, as always, politically incorrect (as per this site) and can state there opinions in a well reasoned way too. This is a rare combination.

As a newbie blogger, I will continue....from my last blog. The other side of the coin, is that living in T.O., I must either look friendly or like I am a person of great knowledge as I get stopped constantly, people asking me for directions (I was walking down the street and a driver asked me if I knew where a gas station was....Seriously dude, I'm walking, do I look like I know where a gas station is?), money, subway tokens and well for advice. I was in Shopper's Drug Mart and someone asked me about the sale price on an item and I interuppted her and said "I don't work here." She said, "I know" and continued to ask me about the details of the item on sale. I had to laugh. I need to charge for these services.

"people asking me for directions (I was walking down the street and a driver asked me if I knew where a gas station was....Seriously dude, I'm walking, do I look like I know where a gas station is?)"

Somebody asked you for help or directions?.. assuming maybe you live there or might be familiar with the area? Shame on them! Seriously dude, I'm important and walking leave me the f@#k alone!

This is exactly the type of attitude that is the problem in Vancouver. Go to most American cities like New York -- people will take time and help you find a street or address. How about last weekend when I was in Seattle for example.. me and my girlfriend where trying to locate a specific sushi restaurant downtown. We asked a couple on the street who weren't exactly sure, but instead of leaving it at that, they actually called a friend on their cell phone who gave specific directions. That's how it should be.. People should be cool and help each other out.

Unfortunately there are too many me-me, ignorant, lazy, self-centered bastards living in this city. They would just rather say 'i dunno' regardless.

OK!